The work First Kiss (Maranhão) is part of Compositions for Insurgent Times. The installation aims to recover memories of the first kiss and propose an investigation into issues of territoriality, cultures and political contexts linked to the first kiss, in addition to mapping different generational views of this experience, especially regarding the resistance faced by people who experience the dissidence of gender.
The work presents the encounters and conversations about the first kiss of three LGBTQI+ people over 50 years old, born in different regions of Maranhão. “*Rita, a black transgender woman, educator and player of different cultural manifestations, including the celebration of the Divine; *César, a homosexual black cis man, priest of Afro-Brazilian religion and leader in different political movements in the fight against religious intolerance; and *Marta, a lesbian black cis woman who owns a wonderful bar”.
Rafael RG lives and works between São Luís, Belo Horizonte and Guarulhos. He has a degree in Visual Arts from Belas Artes de São Paulo (PROUNI Scholarship – 2010). He participated in exhibitions and festivals in Brazil and in other countries. He received, among other awards, the 1st Foco ArtRio Award, the Honra ao Mérito Arte e Patrimônio Award/ IPHAN, the Centro Cultural São Paulo Acquisition Award, the Iberê Camargo Scholarship for residency at Künstlerhaus Bremen, Germany, and the Pampulha Scholarship for residency at Museu de Arte da Pampulha, in Minas Gerais, Brazil. Among his recent residencies are Gasworks, in London (2018); Black Rock Senegal, in Dakar (2019); Triangle France – Asterides, in Marseile (2020).
*fictional names
TESTIMONIALS
1
My first kiss was in my mother’s house, in my own room, in own my bed. It was with my own brother. We slept in the same bed, we were very close at the time, and now we don’t talk anymore.
But I remember it was a very exciting thing, a new emotion, like eating new food, delicious food that you had never eaten before and was tasting it for the first time. And I soon found out that it would be something I would always want in my life. That emotion, that desire to always discover a new taste. I always liked kissing.
After that childhood experience I had another first kiss. I was already a woman, (since I was a child I identified myself as such, but I only transitioned in my late teens). I knew that boy by sight. He dated a friend of mine. My friend said he was a bottom, I never thought I would be with a bottom man. But one day I saw him coming out of the mangrove, he was selling shrimp. We kissed and it was wonderful. That emotion again.
He even teased me, said my cock was small. But we kissed and I could taste in the flavour of his kiss that he loved me too.
2
Sometimes we don’t even remember what we ate yesterday, but sitting down and talking we remember. I’ve never talked about it with anyone, but the memory I have is of my neighbour. My next door neighbour. I was young but I was already attracted, not to him, but to other men, but I was afraid of that feeling. I used to go to his house and one day he kissed me.
I wanted that, but I didn’t quite understand what was going on either. We kissed and I liked it, but on the next day I didn’t want to go to his house to play. But I went some other day, and when I got there he was alone, and we kissed again. We kissed a lot.
A while later at school I felt very attracted to a friend of mine. But I didn’t feel safe at school, I was afraid they would find out I was different. With my neighbour I felt safe. Until one day my classmate and I started dating. I was in love with him, but one day we broke up and decided to look for girlfriends for both of us because we were afraid someone would find out. That’s when I kissed a woman for the first time. I lived for 50 years in the same house, it was a time when people were born and lived all their lives in the same house. But over time I lost contact with my neighbour, until one day he moved out and I never saw him again
3
So I guess I don’t even remember my first kiss! There have been so many kisses I’ve given in this life… But I have a memory of one that must have been the first. It was on the riverbank. A school tour, a picnic near the river. We came sitting side by side on the school bus. During the tour I stole a kiss from her. I was nervous. I already felt that I liked women, and that it made me different from my peers. Right after I kissed her, she turned to me and said, “What are you doing?” And I said I didn’t know what I was doing or why I was doing it, and she said she liked it. After that day I fell in love with a woman who lived in my street. She was much older than me and was married. She treated me like I was her daughter. But I wanted more! One day she was going on a trip and invited me to go along. At that time it was just me and Mom at home, and Mom found out that I wanted to travel with that woman and tied me up in the backyard so I wouldn’t run away.
Ixi, since then there have been so many stories, so many women.
Texts sent by the artist